Thursday, February 7, 2008

Albert Camus and Thomas Aquinus

Aquinus: somebody had to tip over the first domino

Camus: either come to terms with it or...suicide

Aquinus: chicken egg chicken egg chicken egg chicken egg chicken egg chicken egg

Camus: i haven't got an answer for you, nor you for me

I cannot tell you what change took place in my mind when I first read Camus. I had always been precocious, asking for answers that no one could give. I just had to accept some things without proof and I would feel better. In their mind, I was approaching the issue in a pointless way: sort of like trying to reason a headache into oblivion instead of simply taking two Tylenol and being shut of it. But I have never been one for medication. I would rather ache and think than be blissfully apathetic.

Camus taught me that there is no answer. There are no long years of searching and enlightenment at the end of it all. There is only the void of absurdity. There is no higher cause for disease, death, happiness, good fortune. There is only the Russian roulette of absurdity, and you either keep pulling the trigger or you turn the weapon on yourself. Perhaps this seems sad to you. That I do not hold any mystical beliefs and so tend to be melancholic. But you do not know what a relief this was to me. I no longer had to explain anything. I did not have to try to believe in something I did not believe in. I did not have to observe the sacraments. I was set free to live as a human being with only my thoughts to guide me. I did not have to reference the holy texts. I did not have to try to logically prove the existence of god or anything else for that matter. I am an absurd human being, and I owe no one or thing my penance.

Good try, Thomas, but Camus has you beat.

1 comment:

Theresa said...

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